Jennette McCurdy is well aware that the title of her new book, “I’m Glad My Mom Died” (Simon & Schuster) is making headlines. , she doesn’t say that lightly. “
McCurdy, who co-starred with Ariana Grande on Nickelodeon’s iCarly and its spin-off Sam & Cat, hopes readers understand why she makes such a bold statement.
“I hope that by the end the reader will feel like, ‘This makes sense.'”
The 30-year-old wrote in her book that her mother, Debra, was “a narcissist” and “emotionally, mentally and physically abused”. Her mother insisted she shower until her late teens, claiming she wasn’t washing her hair properly, McCurdy said. McCurdy says.
It wasn’t until McCurdy sought treatment after his mother died from complications of cancer in 2013 that he began to fully deal with the trauma he suffered. Prior to her treatment, McCurdy was a heavy drinker and she was in an unhealthy romantic relationship. After her years of working on herself, she’s sharing her own story with the world.Writing this book, she says, has been an emotional rollercoaster. says.
“I was crying while writing it, but I was laughing as I remembered something. The way my mother spoke was humorous and very unique, and writing it out was a very dynamic and emotional experience.”
McCurdy, who hosts a podcast called “Empty Inside,” spoke with the Associated Press about reflection, therapy, and how to get back to work in front of the cameras.
Answers have been edited for clarity and length.
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AP: It’s one thing to find out about your childhood through therapy, and it’s another to share those findings with the world. So, and why did you want to publish it now in a book?
McCurdy: I think finding a shape is very important. There are certainly many stages in the process. It took me a very long time in therapy to process the events that happened to me as a child. I had to do much of that excavation work myself.
AP: How do you feel about your childhood and your mother now?
McCurdy: My grandfather passed away a few years ago. And I was able to really experience what I consider to be the more common grieving process of a family member who was really close to me, even though I was so deeply angry because of the death of her mother. , felt very sorry for her mother. And I could feel her compassion and sympathy and then just her anger and rage, she was crying because I miss her. She was upset that she was crying that she missed her and felt she didn’t deserve these tears. I think abusive love is so complicated…it gets mixed up and messy.
AP: Your book is also a reminder that people don’t really know what’s going on with someone because people look at you on these shows and probably think, ‘Oh, she’s got everything. I will give it to you.
McCurdy: My life is so boring right now. At the time, being on this children’s TV show, so shiny, so sophisticated, just seemed like perfection…my real life was the exact opposite. Really confused. But looking back on it now, I can see there was a lot of humor in it. As painful as it is to be in an ambulance with her mother when she’s cramping during a seizure, but when you look up (on the billboard) and see my face, my life is me. I felt like I was mocking
AP: Are you done acting yet?
McCurdy: Recently, since I wrote this book, there’s been a part of me that I might write something for myself. I could see things like that happening where I think there’s a version of acting that could be healing for me right now, especially if I’m writing something like that. rice field.
AP: I really have to shout how wonderful it was when I found the right therapist.
McCurdy: It’s very important, isn’t it? You’re going to get some doozies and you need to try some. They seem very into doodling and what they are doing.
AP: Are you still in therapy?
McCurdy: I am. I just saw a therapist yesterday. Interestingly, looking at my diary from when I first started treatment, how many times did I overeat and purge today? And I’m trying to build a better relationship with alcohol. Now I feel like I’m adjusting a bit or thinking about turning 30. How amazing it is to be able to attend a therapy session and talk (exploitatively) about turning 30! It would be wonderful.
AP: How is your relationship with food now?”
McCurdy: I’m not obsessed with food at all and I’m so glad you asked. Because I want people to know what I believe in. I feel great about my recovery. I consider myself recovered. I want people who are suffering now to know that they can recover.
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